There are some interactions which can really send us (almost uncontrollably) into a place that feels small. Here are my top tips to stay present in the moment.
I don't know about you but there are some situations in my work place that really make me feel comfortable and then others where a little seed of doubt seems to grow exponentially in my mind and ends up being the driving factor in how I act. It's taken a while but here are a few tips for overcoming this anxiety and feeling more like a lion rather than a mouse!
Check-in with how you're carrying y0urself
In the interactions you are having, how are you standing. Are your shoulders hunched? Are you looking down? Do you feel small and therefore make yourself look small? If so, then try a power pose! Yes I know its cheesy and cliché but have a go. Either pick a character or a person you know who you feel absolutely emulates confidence. Ask yourself how they would stand.
If you can't think of anyone then you could always revert to the classic "super woman" pose. Stand tall with your feet shoulder-width apart, place your hands on your hips, and lift your chin slightly. This posture not only takes up physical space but also projects an image of strength and confidence. Do this for a few minutes before going into a conversation that's going to be difficult.
Think About How You Want To Respond
Collecting your thoughts allows you to formulate a well-considered and articulate response. It helps you avoid impulsivity or being swayed by emotions, ensuring that your words carry clarity and conviction. Select a few things that you want from the conversation. Ask what is absolutely important to you? Make an agreement beforehand about a) how you want to feel after the conversation b) what you will say yes to and c) how you are going to state you request (if you have one). Then off this focus on what you want out of the conversation. How much wiggle room is thee in that ask.
Have Some Key Phrases
Stress can often be caused by not knowing what you want to say. Have a few key phrases prepared that will help you move the conversation on and share your view too. For example, you could say:
""I understand where you're coming from, and I see it differently."
or
"I appreciate your viewpoint, and I'd like to offer an alternative perspective."
The key in both these phrases is to use 'and' and not 'but. This is because 'and' allows both viewpoints to exist at the same time. This is very important to help someone feel heard.
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